It has been a couple of days since I got back from Manila. Despite of my short-lived vacation, I am happy that I did fly up to see my family and Ate Desi who came all the way from Australia. I also met up with some of my very good friends and felt guilty that I never had enough time to visit some more of them. If I can only extend my 24 hours into days to make sure I have seen and reconnected to all family and friends I left behind.
While relishing the remain of my days in Manila, I can't help but miss the kind of life I had before going overseas. I met with Honey and Cha one Saturday and walked into a nail parlor to have my pedicure done, which I have done for the longest time. The one who did my nails just loved all the stories I've been telling her. For the first time in a long time, I felt so relaxed enjoying this laid-back lifestyle in Manila. I started remembering my old routines: usual dinner and gimmicks with friends, inuman on Friday nights, coffee on Saturdays, beauty day every other week, shopping, figuring out how to fill my schedule for weekdays and weekends. I miss how I took good care of myself and live that quality kind of life I have always enjoyed.
Living here on the other hand felt so different. For one thing, the kind of service that I get around here is not at par with the kind of experience I had in Manila. I never seem to connect with the people who does my nails, hair, food or whatever. My time is consumed mostly with work. I kept bring home proposals and demos to finish. I signed up to gym which I never go to because I never had enough time or energy to exercise. Acid churns in my stomach because of stress. Life here is entirely different than what I had back home.
But strange enough, I'm getting used to this kind of toxicness. I found this sense of self worth that has somehow left me satisfied and clamoring for more challenges. Manila maybe home sweet home but here in Singapore is somehow my self realisation of what I am capable with. And if I can prove to myself that I can make it in this city, I guess I can make it anywhere.